Every Wednesday brings a fresh opportunity to voice frustrations, and today I’m diving into the world of food apps. You know, those handy applications on your smartphone designed to help you order food with just a few taps.
At first glance, this concept seemed revolutionary. Imagine being able to browse menus, place orders, and have delicious meals delivered right to your doorstep without leaving your couch. However, let’s face it: the reality is far from perfect, and there are numerous aspects of these apps that can be extremely irritating. So, this week’s focus is on airing grievances about food delivery apps.
No one should have to endure the hassle that comes with them. Surely, there must be a more efficient solution!
The Overabundance of Apps
One of my primary frustrations with food apps is the sheer volume of them. It feels like there are at least three or four different platforms just for food delivery—not to mention all the individual restaurant apps that add to the chaos. Each one operates differently, which can be quite confusing. For instance, when I just want to grab a simple dollar coffee from McDonald's, I often find myself struggling to navigate their app, which is entirely distinct from the Jersey Mike’s app or the Starbucks app.
What I envision is a single, streamlined app called "FŪD" (pronounced like 'food,' not like Elmer Fudd). This app would encompass everything related to food services. Need a meal delivered? FŪD has you covered. Want to browse a menu? FŪD can do that too. Looking to accumulate reward points for your dining habits? FŪD again!
Now, I admit I don't quite know how such a service would function. Who would be in charge of running FŪD? Perhaps I could take the lead with some backing from angel investors, but I suspect that established corporations might oppose this idea, which could undermine the simplicity and effectiveness that FŪD aims to provide.
My Reluctant Acceptance of Food Apps
There was a time when I firmly stood against using food apps, and in many respects, I still feel that way. It strikes me as ridiculous that I need an app, a sort of digital intermediary, just to inform Wendy's that I'm craving a Dave's Double—like needing a special burger hotline. But much like how people eventually adapted to emails, I too succumbed to the convenience of mobile apps and amassed quite the collection.
What led to my change of heart? Honestly, it was the enticing promotion of a $0.99 any-size coffee at McDonald's that finally convinced me to give in. So here I am, perhaps a bit of a sellout, all because of a dollar coffee.
The Issue with Gift Cards
Recently, I stumbled upon an infuriating fact: many restaurant apps do not allow you to use gift cards for your orders. While I typically shy away from advocating for government regulations, I believe this issue deserves immediate attention. Though I understand it relates to processing fees, it’s absurd that companies already pocketing my money then dictate how I can spend it. Additionally, you can't even use restaurant gift cards through delivery services, which seems utterly unreasonable. If I ever run for office, you can bet this topic will be front and center on my agenda.
My Reward Points Pride
Despite my mixed feelings about food apps, I have developed an unusual sense of pride regarding my accumulated reward points. There’s something satisfying about knowing I can snag an Egg McMuffin for free thanks to those points. Yet, I keep this achievement under wraps because, frankly, no one else seems to share my enthusiasm.
I couldn't even recall the last time I paid extra for guacamole at Chipotle; my points cover it! The only hitch is that they only allow you to redeem one reward at a time, meaning I often end up paying for extras on someone else's order. It’s like a secret flex that I can't help but relish—almost akin to having a black AmEx card, just a few steps down.
This is especially true when I think about the Jersey Mike’s app, which rewarded us for correctly predicting NFL and NHL games. The joy I felt eating a chicken cheesesteak earned through sports picks was unmatched. Of course, I could have just placed a traditional bet and used my winnings for sandwiches, but where’s the fun in that?
The Delivery Mishaps That Ruin Plans
Lastly, let’s discuss one of my biggest pet peeves with food delivery apps like DoorDash, Uber Eats, or even Postmates. When things go awry, they can completely derail your evening plans. For example, I once ordered pizza and wings for New Year’s Eve a full day in advance. Yet, despite the time that had elapsed, the restaurant abruptly canceled my order just thirty minutes before delivery—without any explanation.
Though I recognize this incident falls more on the restaurant than the app, it still feels like a failure on the app's part. This left me frantically searching for a last-minute alternative to ensure we didn’t ring in the New Year without food. It highlighted a significant flaw in these apps: when they function correctly, they’re fantastic (albeit with inflated prices), but when they fail? The experience can be catastrophic enough to inspire an entire edition of The Gripe Report.
That's a wrap for this week's installment of The Gripe Report! If you have any gripes you'd like to share for future editions, don’t hesitate to reach out at: matthew.reigle@outkick.com.
